You - I can't deal with you when you're like this.
Him - No one asked you to.
You - Mature.
Him - Seriously, just go.
You - I can't exactly leave you like this.
Him - Why? None of this is for your benefit.
You - Well...
Him - I'm going to feel like this whether you stay or not. You being here isn't exactly helping if you're just complaining that it's hard for you. This isn't about you.
Silence
You - That's the bit I don't understand.
Him - What?
You - Why don't I make it better?
Him - How could you?
You - Why don't I make it better?
Him - Because it isn't about you.
You - But even things that aren't about you, in my life, you have an impact on them.
Him - This is different.
You - This is depression. Why doesn't having me make it any easier?
Him - Maybe it does.
You - Hmm?
Him - Maybe I'd be even worse if it weren't for you.
You - Worse than tears during Attenborough?
Him - Maybe I wouldn't even be here.
You - Melodrama doesn't suit you.
Him - Yeah... true. Let's keep it light.
Silence
You - I am going to go.
Him - Really?
You - Yes.
Him - Right.
You - I need some distance?
Him - Do you find this off putting?
You - Well, I don't want to jump your bones... but I'm not going to leave you over it.
Him - Right.
You - It's pretty fucking hard. You impact on everything I do... everything, is about you. My days have a shifted... a sort of shifted kind of priority or focus or whatever now you're in them. Not because I meant to, but just because the things I do with you make me the happiest so they're the ones I've put to the top. But with you...
Him - I'm the same.
You - No. No you're not... you have all these little insular bubbles that you've chosen to keep me out of.
Him - Well, it's not exactly a fun 'bubble' I've kicked you out of. It's not a bachelor pad, it's...
You - Fine. I know this is different. The depression is different. But you have these safety valves on us. Places you'll still be able to go when we're done. And I don't have those. So, just... right now... just, I want to be able to go. Because I never go. I always choose being with you over doing anything else and this is not the first time I've been a bit uncomfortable with that.
Him - So...
You - No. It's definitely not over. I just want to be OK with walking away from you sometimes.
Him - Right.
You - Will you be OK?
Him - No. But then I wasn't OK before so it's fine.
You - OK. Well, there isn't really a neat ending to this little debacle.
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