Sunday, July 31, 2011

As We Know It

I suspect the apocalypse might have felt very different had you been in London when it happened... but for the residents of Norton Fitzwarren it was a fairly unremarkable event at first. People didn't really know what to do... we thought about looting but agreed as a village that it seemed pretty unreasonable. There's only really one shop in Norton Fitzwarren and the general consensus was that the apocalypse was probably not Nigel and Beryl's fault.

People carried on watering their lawns and walking their dogs. Nobody really knew what to do. In fact, if it hadn't been for the fact that there were no cars or electricity, you'd barely have known it was the apocalypse. It seemed more like a village on a health kick who had been instructed to play a lot more board games and look worried whenever they passed the fridge.

It wasn't until the 3rd day that people started to get noticeably shifty. Food was running a bit low and people like Mr Baxter were nervously hurrying their Yorkshire Terrier around the block looking suspiciously at anyone who was complaining of hunger. I'd never thought the residents of Norton Fitzwarren capable of eating a dog, but all of a sudden you had to really feel for pet owners.

No one at all knew what to do come Friday. A lot of people had already bought their tickets for the Line Dancing night at the Village Hall. Should we still go? Was there any point to a refund? Would there be any loose dogs...?

We all suspected in London there must have been lots of fighting and scrapping for food... it was hard to tell without any form of media. I think we were all pleased that so far no one here had felt like doing any murdering. I'm not sure 40% of the village really had the upper body strength. After the 4th day I think people started to realise that we weren't likely to get some sort of village messenger/town crier type figure coming over the horizon with instructions. We thought perhaps we ought to start thinking about getting organised.

We had a meeting and decided to form an Apocalypse Committee. These folk would be in charge of working out how we were going to feed everyone and keep us all warm during winter. We thought perhaps it might be prudent to bunch together a bit more and use some houses as storage. A few people really weren't keen; Mrs Shoe has just had new carpets, so we let her off.

A far as apocalypses go it really wasn't bad. Once you'd got over the shock of killing your first cow or tilling a field it really wasn't too bad. And we'd all seen Friends so many times that really it was just as fun to recite them round the fire without watching. Mr Baxter does a mean How You Doin'. We strongly suspected things might be about to get a lot worse just around the corner... but for now, things were going alright. And we'd formed our Apocalypse Committee an awful lot quicker than the residents of nearby Staplegrove so we were awfully pleased about that too...




Above is just a short bit of a new story/thingy/idea I'm working on about the end of the world in a small village. Just playing for the minute but any feedback is appreciated.

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