Thursday, December 12, 2013


The train sped quickly into the heart of Somerset like an arrow going into the heart of something else. There was a girl on the train like a bacteria on the aforementioned arrow. The bacteria girl from the simile was happy and excited to be going to Somerset because when she was there two great things were going to happen:

1. She was going to see The Hobbit 2.
2. Her sister was going to turn 30.

Aw, how lovely, I hear you think... this girl on a train is happy that her sister is going to have a nice birthday. No. Either you were right and I just heard your thoughts wrong, or you were wrong and it turns out that's not why I'm happy!

I am happy (I'm also the girl and the bacteria from the train and the arrow in case you weren't following) because for a brief window of 2.75 years I will be able to smugly say about my older sister,

"Oh, you know, she's in her early 30s." and the same will not be true about me!

These are the golden years of younger sisterhood. All those times she failed to help me get dog poo off my foot, told me to jump off the climbing frame carrying a plastic bag because "it would act as a parachute", cut all my hair off, laughed hysterically when I pooped myself at Disneyland, called me a Witch, told me Martin Crow would never go out with me, wouldn't let me have Robbie Williams as my boyfriend in the Take That game and made me choose Gary Barlow or Mark Owen instead, insisted I was the captain of the aeroplane when we played in trees while she was the mechanic and had the freedom to climb all over the tree while I sat in a fork and did nothing, had two beautiful kids and a wedding while I still live in sin with a partial career... SUCK IT SARAH YOU'RE IN YOUR EARLY THIRTIES!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA.

ps I love you very much

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