I'm genuinely blogging from the inside of a haggis. I've had the weirdest dat today - when I woke up there was a tall man with a blue shirt on standing over my bed holding a hessian sack. I was a little alarmed to see him there and asked what was going on. He asked me why I dribble so much at night and I was a little embarassed. He took this oppurtunity to put the bag over my head and kidnap me.
Then he put me in this haggis. It's moist, not uncomfortable, and a little smelly if I'm honest. I don't think he intends to kill me - it's potentially an experiment to see if I'll eat my way out. I don't think I will - at least not for a few days as I am pretty good at coping without food and I also like to be the winner very much.
The man had a light Welsh accent which is another baffling clue to this puzzle - I'm 99% sure haggis is a Scottish delicacy which could mean he is working for some kind of alliance. Alliances freak me out really. Especially the Royal Sun Alliance. That is a freakishly big, hot, regal alliance.
So, all in all, there's not really much to say in this blog as I haven't been able to do much today due to kidnap and haggis restraint. If I am out by tomorrow I'll let you know how it goes but in the meantime if you have any ideas on how to escape do let me know.